05/06/25

Good morning! It’s Tuesday, May 6th.

National Nurses Day. And National Teachers Day.

And so it begins. The week of my mother. Who was a nurse. And a teacher. And also a mom. And also it’s about to be her birthday.

But enough about my mom! (Sorry mom.) Teachers are great. Nurses are great. They both do an incredibly hard job for not enough money and not enough support, and somehow they still do it because they are, quite frankly, better than most of us.  

And now, the news.

Update: Israel-Gaza

-via Axios

Starting in Gaza, which Israel has threatened with a new ground operation to gradually reoccupy all of, the whole thing, if no ceasefire deal is worked out by the time Trump visits next week.

This whole thing depends on him?

Oh no.

So May 15th is the current deadline.

The plan is horrific. Horrific is the nicest way to put it.

The plan is for the Israeli Defense Forces to flatten any remaining buildings in Gaza and displace the entire population of Gaza – an area that once held 2.1 million Palestinians.

They would all be sent to a single “humanitarian area,” which is currently undefined, but one can only assume the word “humanitarian” doesn’t deserve to be anywhere near it.

The alternative, per an Israeli official, is for Palestinians to leave for other countries which, again, this is per an Israeli official, is “in line with President Trump’s vision for Gaza.”

Trump’s vision for Gaza, as a reminder, is for all of the Palestinians to leave the home that they have built and then turn it into a gold-plated Trump plaza cash grab.

To be clear, there is no world in which Palestinians are leaving Gaza voluntarily. They are leaving under duress. Whether they leave because the IDF is literally flattening every single building in Gaza, or because they do that before then, it is not voluntary.

It is because, after Israel’s defense forces have already cut off food, water, and medicine to civilians in Gaza, they are now going to take over the entire space.

There is nothing voluntary about this.

Trump’s $1000 Offer

-via AP News

Meanwhile, here in America, Trump continues to push his mass deportation agenda ahead. Now he’s offering $1000 and travel assistance back to their home to immigrants who are in the United States illegally.

They also noted that they will be deprioritizing for detention and removal folks who use the CBP Home app to tell the government that they will return home on their own.

So that’s… that.

100% Tariff on Movies

-via NPR

Calling it a national security threat, Trump announced on Sunday that all movies made outside of the United States would now be hit with a 100% tariff.

This one is… confusing.

Because on the one hand – I work in this industry. I want jobs back in California. We need this to happen.

However, on the other hand… I don’t want him to have anything to do with my industry. He’s not, you know… he’s not handling anyone’s industry with care. You think I want to have his little grub hands all over my precious jobs and also my precious Ted Lasso season four? No! Do you understand how hard I, personally, and only I, worked to get a fourth season?

Sorry you never made it as an actor and had to become a tyrannical leader and are such a bad person that the director of Home Alone 2: Lost in New York literally wants to cut your scene out of it but like… please stay away from our industry.

On the other hand – Gavs. Gavie Newson.

Why don’t you step up, my guy? How is Trump leading the charge here? What? Are you too busy podcasting? Leave that to the Kims, and get back to pretending you’re not running for president by running this state well.

First Ted Lasso season 4, now saving the entire film industry in Los Angeles.

Must I do everything myself?

I should note that, as I was writing this story, it broke that Gavs wants to work with Trump on a $7.5 billion tax credit for Hollywood. But it’s brand new breaking news and I had already written the thing about Ted Lasso and I felt good about it and you know what? Yeah, I am carrying this industry on my little shoulders already!

Anyway, we’ll see if the two are able to broker a deal.

Abortion Pill Heads to Court

-via NY Times

Mirroring the Biden administration’s position, on Monday the Trump administration asked a federal judge to dismiss a lawsuit seeking to restrict access to the abortion pill mifepristone.

This one is genuinely surprising because, and never let us forget, Trump is the one who put three judges on the Supreme Court who lied about whether Roe was settled law and then turned around and, at first opportunity, gleefully, and even more than they needed to, struck that right down.

However, he still asked for the court to dismiss this case, with the administration saying it does not meet the legal standard to be heard in federal court.

San Diego Boat Capsizes

-via CNN

Turning to America’s Finest City where three people are dead, four are injured, and another seven are missing after a small boat overturned at Torrey Pines State Beach.

It’s unclear where the 45-foot boat was coming from. Though the boat is commonly used by fishers, it is also commonly used by migrants. I want to be clear – it is not clear what the circumstances were of how people found themselves on the boat. But with it looking more and more like it’s going to be a mass-casualty event, that’s not me saying it, that’s the Encinitas Deputy Fire Chief, maybe we can worry a little less about the citizenship status of the human beings for the time being, ya know?

And that’s it. That’s the news.

I’m proud of America’s Finest City. Always. For I am of San Diego.

Oceanside, actually. Obviously. (That obviously only works if you know about Oceanside before it got fancy.)

I’m also proud of nurses. And teachers. There’s a lot more vomit involved in both jobs than we realize. Do you understand how many times they have had someone vomit on them? If someone got sick on me once, I would find a new career. Full stop. I gotta do some re-thinking. Not them! That’s incredible!

We’ve got to pay them more.

But more than… not more than nurses! Do you think I’m a moron?? More than… beverages. Luckily it is also national beverage day, just to save me I guess… because you also never leave me parched…. I’m proud of you.