08/14/25

Good morning! It’s Thursday, August 14th.

Financial Awareness Day.

Eh. Can’t be aware of what you don’t have. You want me to talk more about this day, you gotta pay me $10 million a year. Or I walk.

Or. I. Walk.

And now, the news.

Russia’s Invasion of Ukraine

-via CNN, BBC, CBS News, and Washington Post

Starting with Friday’s meeting between Trump and Putin.

It’s still hasn’t happened yet.

(whoosh)

Just kidding. That’s not the story.

That’s called comedy.

On Wednesday, Trump, as well as Ukraine’s Zelensky and leaders from various NATO countries had various meetings, in an attempt to have their voices heard by Trump, as well as set an agenda, before he meets with Trump.

The strategy the countries were able to settle on is that Trump will demand a cease-fire before any serious truce talks, and Ukraine must be in peace talks.

Trump himself said he hoped that this Friday meeting would prompt a second meeting between Putin and Zelensky, but it would depend on how Friday goes.

So no one worry – it all comes down to Trump!

When asked if there would be consequences for Putin if he doesn’t agree to stop the war on Friday, Trump said there would be, “very severe consequences."

There are many big questions remaining in what this Friday conversation will look like but Ukraine has been very clear – they will not be giving an inch of land to Russia.

Russia believes that the land they’ve stolen from Ukraine is just magically theirs now.

While there are many things to work out in these talks, those two conflicting beliefs are going to be the hardest to recon.

DC: 1984

-via CNN, AP News, The Guardian, Time, and Axios

Moving over to DC, a White House official announced Wednesday during the day, so before you hear this before after I record this (time, ya know) that the National Guard’s presence in the city is expected to ramp up “significantly higher.”

For what? For why?

Literally, why? Nothing has happened to prompt a “significantly higher” number of troops in the city.

Unless… the National Treasure movie is real, and they need to protect the Bill of Rights or the Constitution or… something. (I didn’t see those movies.)

It’s unknown how many additional troops will be added, but the White House said the guards will change from a nighttime presence to a 24/7 presence by the time you hear this.

Here are the types of arrests that are happening in this crime-ridden hellscape of a city: The ATF, FBI, and US Park Police all searched the car of someone park just outside of a legal parking area as they ate takeout with a friend.

What if it was a date? This poor person. Four federal agencies? While you’re just trying to eat some Taco Bell?

The first two nights saw 66 arrests, with 43 of them happening on Tuesday night. TBD on if Tuesday was an outlier, or if we’re about to see a trend where each night the number of arrests grows.

Now, to be fair, aside from the four federal agencies that shook down the person who parked a little wrong, other charges have included assault with a deadly weapon, homicide, drug possession with intent to distribute, unlawful entry, resisting arrest, lewd acts, stalking, reckless driving, and driving under the influence. Additionally, thirteen illegal firearms have been seized.

So, there are things happening.

But it’s also unclear what the numbers are for which of those charges and I will note that DC had 56 arrests per day in 2024. Because again – crime is down. With all that’s going on, they made fewer arrests on Tuesday than they did on average last year.

But don’t let logic get in the way of dictatorship. Trump is already eyeing a longer stay in DC, saying he’s looking at a crime bill because DC will be used, “as a very positive example, and we’re going to be asking for extensions on that, long-term extensions, because you can’t have 30 days.”

We will see what a 24/7 posturing of the troops brings.

Newson v Trump v Maps

-via The Hill

And as Trump’s dictator dreams come to fruition in DC, they are getting some pushback when it comes to gerrymandering. On Wednesday, California’s Governor Newsom told Trump that, since he failed to respond to a letter calling for him to tell red states to back off their gerrymandering moves, California will now fully gerrymander our maps to be completely blue.

He did this in a post that mocks the way Trump posts on social media.

So it’s all normal here.

I don’t even know what to say.

Kennedy Center Honors

-via CNN

And finally… we all saw all of this coming but we definitely saw this coming.

The Kennedy Center Honors recipient list came out and boy oh boy… will I be busy that night.

Fear not! Trump was “98% involved.”

Couldn’t get him for that last 2% huh?

“We ended the woke political programming, and we’re restoring the Kennedy Center as the premier venue for performing arts anywhere in the country, anywhere in the world.”

He also added, “I used to host the ‘Apprentice’ finales, and we did rather well with that.”

Sylvester Stallone, KISS, and Gloria Gaynor (sorry mom – she’s a fan) are among the honorees.

But who will host such a prestigious event?

Well Trump himself, of course!

Honestly, if we just let him do lame stuff like this all the time he never would have wanted to be president. I’m not even kidding. This and a great job slugger from his dad and we’d all have free health care.

Think about that for a while.

He also said he wants to rename the center the Trump/Kennedy Center so… low on the list of things to worry about, I guess.

What a time. Quite the time to watch the world burn!

And that’s it. That’s the news.

I’m proud of money. It’s nice. I hear.

But more than money… because even if I have one hundred thousand million of you, it still wouldn’t be enough – I’m proud of you.