05/30/26

Good morning! It’s Friday, May 29th.

Learn About Composting Day

It’s food that’s trash that’s good for worms now. Lesson over.

And now, the news.

Dallas Apartment Explosion

-via ABC News

Starting with, and this is wild but true… starting with another deadly, chemical-related, explosion.

In Dallas, TX at least three people are dead and five others were injured after a gas leak led to an explosion at an apartment complex in the city. Officials warn that there are others missing and there could be more deaths reported as the search continues.

Blue Origin Explodes

-via BBC

On Thursday, Blue Origin, the rocket that Jeff Bezos funds and that looks like a rocket and nothing else and how dare you because no one is compensating for anyone when they’re making these things, exploded on the launch pad on Thursday.

The company is not sure what caused the explosion but what we do know for sure is… according to an official at the FAA, "This test was not within the scope of FAA licensed activities."

Great.

When is this Mars thing happening? I’m not saying I want to live there, I’m just saying… if there are two planets are options, I would like to not share the planet with the guys designing the rockets that look like what these rockets look like, that are exploding for unknown reasons.

SCOTUS Sides with Inmate

-via CBS News

On Thursday the Supreme Court ruled in favor of a Black inmate—

Wait! Hang on! This Supreme Court??

Huh. It says this is real.

The High Court ruled in favor of Terry Pitchford, who was on death row for a 2004 robbery in Mississippi. During the robbery, which Pitchford did participate in, the person he was doing the robbery with, 16-year-old Eric Bullins shot and killed the white shop owner. Because Bullins was 16 at the time of the murder, he wasn’t eligible for the death penalty and instead got 20 years in prison.

Because Pitchford was 18, he was charged with capital murder, and the state sought the death penalty. Again, he didn’t pull the trigger.

During jury selection, the DA rejected four of five potential Black jurors, something known as a peremptory strike. In the end, the jury was composed of 11 White jurors and one Black juror. 

The DA Doug Evans, who was also known to the court for doing the same thing in 2019 for Curtis Flowers. 

The case will now go back down to the lower courts where prosecutors can try Pitchford again. If not, the state will have to release him.

What a great time to remind you that the DA position is electable in 47 out of 50 states.

Alito Continues to be on Brand

-via Daily Beast

Coming off of that story, it’s a bummer to be like “but the court still sucks” which this story isn’t. But… Samuel Alito? That guy?

Hard pass.

Hey, remember how I call Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito Samuel Aleako here because he almost certainly leaked the Hobby Lobby ruling and so then it’s like… okay well I’m not saying he leaked the Roe ruling but I’m not saying he didn’t… 

And remember how there was an Appeal to Heaven flag flying outside of his vacation house, which is a flag heavily aligned with the January 6th insurrectionists and when people were like – hey! That’s wildly inappropriate for a Supreme Court justice, or any federal judge really, to have outside of their house! He was like – nah! My wife is just v v fond of flying flags.

Remember that?

Well it turns out, that’s not the only way he’s playing it fast and loose with the ethics…

Because his baby boy, Philip Alito, got a secret appointment as a lawyer in Trump’s Treasury Department in the early days of this second term.

Why is this an issue? Well, here’s a great example…

While junior was working at the Treasury, a suit challenging Trump’s use of emergency powers to issue tariffs was argued before the Supremes in November. The Treasury was named in the suit. The department never disclosed junior’s employment, and not only didn’t Justice Aleako recuse himself, but he joined a dissent written by Kavanaugh.

This little slush fund Trump just set up to funnel money to people like the insurrectionists through the DOJ? Philip is in the office responsible for making legal decisions for the agency administering that fund.

And no one is saying anything!!! They’re just like… hey, this is normal and fine.

…it’s not. By the way. Just, to be so clear. It’s super not normal and fine.

How About $250?

-via The Hill

And finally (yes, finally, and I’ll explain why after the whoosh)… hey… you know how you’re always like “ugh!! This thing is $250 and I’m fine with that but I don’t want to carry about 2 $100 bills and a Hamilton. If only there was a simple solution! And if only that simple solution came with a super weird signature with too many letters in relation to that person’s name.”

Well baby – I’ve got the solution.

The treasury, the same department I was just talking about in that last story and that’s how you know they’re on the up and up, would like to create a $250 bill and… they’d like it to have Trump’s face on it.

To quote House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries: “Hard No on a Trump $250 bill.”

Let me just note that, under federal law, it is illegal for living individuals to appear on U.S. currency. I mean, famously, Trump hates following the law but… it’s still important to note.

This isn’t going to happen so I normally wouldn’t even report it but it’s just so embarrassing that I have to. It’s so funny! These people are so hilariously embarrassing. What a wild stack of losers.

Also, this isn’t connected at all but while I was reading about this story, I was reading about it on The Hill and since Trump’s trying to do this and saying it’s for the 250th anniversary of America (which I’m not entirely convinced he understands isn’t his actual birthday), there was another story about the 250th celebration that gave me a little bit of hope for humanity.

Martina McBride, a country singer I love (and that’s always a risk) has pulled out of performing in the celebration. She says she asked a lot of questions and was assured it would be a nonpartisan event so all 50 states, but the more she learned, the more she realized that wasn’t the case. And I don’t care, say what you want about someone signing on to begin with, the fact is that she canceled now.

And if you haven’t listened to Independence Day lately… please do. (spoiler alert, it’s super dark. But dang she’s so talented)

And that’s it. That’s the news.

You know what I’m not covering? The ceasefire deal in Iran. Why? Negotiators says they’re close, however, it sounds like Veep Vance is moving the goalposts and Trump is saying he’s not sure he wants to sign anyway. Trump and Vance seem to think it’s good for them to keep this war going, so until they sign, they won’t get free airtime from me on this podcast, with it’s audience of millions and also tens, depending on which is funnier at the time.

I’m proud of composting. I guess. For some reason. Like, sure.

Also it’s National Alligator Day and those things are scary dinosaurs that do deathrolls… 

But more than alligators. Because you’re not the scariest thing I can think of… I’m proud of you!