08/04/26

Title

No News Is Good Enough

Good morning! It’s Tuesday, August 4th.

National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day

Which I will celebrate for others because I don’t really like chocolate but the last time I skipped a chocolate day, I got in trouble so there we go – National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day

And now, the news.

Cyclosporiasis Deaths

-via NPR

Starting in Michigan, where cyclosporiasis (cyclo-spore-EYE-esis) is responsible for the deaths of two people. These are the first reported deaths linked to the outbreak that began in May. 

To be so, so clear – this is not something that is typically deadly. It doesn’t sound fun, but it’s not typically deadly. However, people who are immunocompromised can have more intense and prolonged symptoms. 

The CDC and FDA are investigating cases of “lettuce no good” in 45 states, making this the largest “lettuce no good, belly VERY bad” outbreak in US history.

GOP Backs Blanche

-via AP News

Here’s the thing – this is going to be a short episode. There just wasn’t much news. Just like we like it. We don’t like the stories, but we like days without a lot of news. 

So here’s the only other story… And you’re gonna be like “whoa! I never saw it coming!” (sarcastic font)

Todd Blanche, who’s been the acting Attorney General and is trying to get the job for real but it looked like he wouldn’t get the job after a few Republican Senators were like “hey I found this spine in my car. It’s dusty, but I bet I might get it to work…” is probably going to get confirmed.

So here’s what’s going on with this.

Todd Blanche was Trump’s personal attorney. 

In 2023, Trump hired Blanche to defend him for the hush-money payments he made to Stormy Daniels (which was actually, technically, election interference, since he only made the payments so that he could make sure that you, as a voter, weren’t fully informed before you cast a ballot). He was also his lawyer for Trump’s 2020 election interference case and the classified documents case. 

As a mahalz, Trump made Todd Blanche the deputy attorney general, under Pam Bondi. When Trump fired Pam Bondi because she wasn’t doing enough political indictments against his enemies, Blanche became the acting AG.

He’s had the gig since April, but in order to make it official it needs to be confirmed by congress. 

And it seemed like it wasn’t going to happen because Republican Senators John Cornyn and Thom Tillis were holding out on the yes vote. 

However, apparently Blanche caught the Sunday scaries and wrote a letter on Sunday night saying that actually the Department of Justice would formally drop the $1.8 billion Anti-Weaponization Fund that Trump wanted to use to pay out, among other people, those that did insurrection in his honor. 

And that was good enough!

Because I’m sure there’s no taksies backsies there.

Also, what are these Senators doing? Neither of them is running for reelection. What do they have to lose? Be an adult! Find a brave!! 

Anyway, so now it sounds like Blanche is going to make it through since he wrote a pretty please letter. The Senate will go on recess on Friday, so the vote will take place before then. Even without Mitch McConnell’s vote, who I’m sure is probably totally healthy and fine and just busy that day, he’ll have the votes if Cornyn and Tillis say yes.

Although, again… they’re not running for reelection. They have the opportunity to do the funniest, and frankly, coolest, thing… 

And that’s it. That’s the news.

See! I told you! Little shorty.

Hey, yesterday was the last day for a special election to be called in Kentucky if a seat were to have opened up in, say, the Senate. Isn’t that interesting?

So now, the thought is, any day now, we expect an announcement giving the actual details about what’s happening with Mitch McConnell. I’m not trying to be callous; he’s a human being but like… we deserve to know what’s happening with one of the very few people making some major decisions about our lives and our country. 

And someone needs to start being honest with us. Hopefully that’ll happen soon. But thank goodness they decided to play politics with it. 

I’m proud of cookies. I like em. Oatmeal raisins specifically and you know what? I refuse to be shamed about this. 

But more than cookies – because you’re sweet enough as is… I’m proud of you.