They Taste Like Pennies
A manhunt ended in Virginia, a deadly explosion in Myanmar left dozens dead, Zelensky accused Russia of abducting Ukrainian children and training some to fight against Ukraine, Israel captured the strategic Beaufort Castle in Lebanon, and protests continued over conditions at New Jersey’s Delaney Hall ICE facility.
Samuel Alito? No Thanks.
A deadly apartment explosion in Dallas left multiple people dead, Blue Origin suffered another rocket explosion on the launch pad, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of a Black death row inmate challenging jury selection, and new questions emerged about conflicts of interest involving Justice Samuel Alito’s son.
“Can You Believe It??” Yeah… I Can…
The death toll from Washington’s paper mill explosion has risen, Israel issued major evacuation orders in southern Lebanon amid renewed strikes, the DOJ launched a new investigation into E. Jean Carroll, detainees at a New Jersey ICE facility reported inhumane conditions during a hunger strike, and Matthew Perry’s former assistant was sentenced in connection with Perry’s death.
I’m Gettin Mad About It Again
A deadly explosion at a Washington paper mill left workers missing and injured, courts in South Carolina and Alabama dealt setbacks to Republican gerrymandering efforts, tensions continued around the fragile Iran ceasefire, and Ken Paxton has won the Texas Senate primary runoff.
Davinci Facts, Cocktail Recipes, and News
An aerospace chemical leak prompted evacuations in Orange County before officials ruled out an explosion risk, a gunman opened fire outside the White House, Trump tied Iran negotiations to expanding the Abraham Accords, and a crowd stampede in South Carolina injured at least 19 people.
She’s Not Bossy, She’s the Boss
House Republicans abruptly recessed to avoid a vote limiting Trump’s war powers in Iran, a proposed Women’s History Museum bill collapsed over anti-trans provisions, and Jeffrey Epstein’s longtime assistant testified before Congress about the abuse and manipulation she says she endured.
But, You Know… Wink Wink…
Raúl Castro was indicted over the 1996 downing of civilian planes, tensions reportedly flared between Trump and Netanyahu over Iran negotiations, a judge ordered the White House to preserve presidential records, insurrectionists reacted to Trump’s controversial payout fund, and a bipartisan housing bill advanced in Congress.
Per the Constitush, Congress Declares War
The Senate narrowly advanced a war powers resolution aimed at limiting Trump’s authority in Iran, the DOJ settlement with Trump permanently blocked the IRS from pursuing charges against him or his sons for past conduct, and primary elections reshaped key Republican races in Texas, Georgia, and Alabama.
It’s Weird Behavior
A deadly shooting at a San Diego mosque is being investigated as a hate crime, Trump’s planned strikes on Iran were paused, the administration moved forward with a controversial $1.776 billion “Anti-Weaponization Fund,” and an ICE officer in Minneapolis was charged after allegedly shooting two immigrants and filing a false report.
Dollar Dollar Billz
A series of random shootings in Austin left four people injured as the WHO declared an Ebola emergency in Central Africa, Trump escalated rhetoric toward Iran, new questions emerged about a massive DOJ slush fund tied to January 6th rioters, and concerns grew over the administration’s embrace of Christian nationalism.
Kash Patel – Put Those Thumbs Down, My Guy
Trump’s trip to China raised new questions about Taiwan and Iran, Kash Patel faced backlash over a VIP snorkeling visit at Pearl Harbor, Republican-led states pushed aggressive new gerrymandering efforts, and the Supreme Court preserved access to telehealth abortion pills - for now.
More Fetching – It’s the Law Today
A Massachusetts man wounded two people after firing more than 60 rounds at drivers outside Boston, House Democrats forced a vote on Ukraine aid over Speaker Johnson’s objections, Alex Murdaugh’s murder conviction was overturned, and a counselor connected to Matthew Perry’s ketamine overdose was sentenced to prison.
If You Can’t Beat Em, Sweetums
Trump escalated rhetoric around Iran while dismissing Americans’ financial concerns, the Supreme Court temporarily preserved access to Mifepristone by mail, and Alabama has entered the gerrymandering chat while South Carolina is saying no (for now).
I Don’t Think Ted Lasso Caused COVID
Iran pushed back on the latest U.S. peace proposal, passengers from the Hantavirus cruise ship began evacuating and returning home, a person was killed at Denver International Airport after being struck by a plane, and Virginia’s Supreme Court overturned a voter-approved redistricting measure.
Don’t Bring Me Your Games, Your Putz
Iran and the U.S. exchanged strikes in the Strait of Hormuz, a former Ohio deputy was found guilty in the killing of Casey Goodson Jr., courts pushed back on Trump policies again, and John Roberts defended the Supreme Court’s latest voting rights ruling.
To Quote Flo Rida and T-Pain
New reporting suggests Iran’s strikes on U.S. bases caused far more damage than disclosed; Tennessee unveiled a heavily gerrymandered congressional map; questions continue around FBI election investigations; and health officials are tracking a Hantavirus outbreak tied to a cruise ship.
I Fear the Brainworm Was Very Well-Fed
A workplace shooting left two dead as Trump paused “Project Freedom,” Republicans pushed $1 billion for Trump’s ballroom security, the EEOC targeted DEI programs, and key primary results rolled in across Ohio, Indiana, and Michigan.
Ron Swanson Would Never Allow This Nonsense
Two mass shootings in Oklahoma and Texas left dozens injured and multiple dead as tensions escalate with Iran, SCOTUS chaos threatens voting maps, and a temporary ruling keeps access to mifepristone in place.
And Also With You
Spirit Airlines collapses, Trump sidesteps war powers, ICE expands abusive practices, abortion access takes another hit, and Republicans openly escalate gerrymandering.
This Is a Fight as Old as Time
This episode is all about the decision out of the Supreme Court, gutting Section 2 of the Voting Rights Act.