01/05/25

Good morning! It’s Monday, January 5th.

National Carver Day – a day created by President Theodore Roosevelt to celebrate George Washington Carver (no one tell Trump, he’ll take the day right away!). In 1939, Carner received the Roosevelt Medal for saving Southern agriculture after he developed a method of restoring nitrogen to fields through crop rotation, for example, rotating cotton with sweet potatoes or legumes (fun word!), since cotton was depleting the soil.

And now, the news.

Update: Venezuela

-via AP News, Reuters, Axios, and CNN

Lots of news to cover since, to misquote America’s first idol and one of only two elections we’ve ever gotten right, I was gone.

Let’s start in Venezuela.

As you may know, I went ahead and released a special episode about Venezuela. I think it’s fair to say that this is the most popular news podcast in America, probably the hemisphere, definitely the planet. And so, I try very hard, of course, to make sure I’m telling these stories responsibly. That goes for every story.

But for this one in particular, because, as I have mentioned before, one of my best friends is from Venezuela and I’ve seen how important it is to her that people are telling this story correctly, and even knowing that she is literally the only person in the galaxy not listening to this podcast (that’s true friendship), it’s extra important to me that, for her, the language I use here is word perfect.

I will not, in this episode or any episode moving forward, refer to Nicolás Maduro as the president or leader. He was hand-picked by Hugo Chavez in 2013 and then stole the two subsequent elections. He is not the legitimate president.

He is a terrorist. He is not a leader.

There is a lot of uncertainty, but my friend was very clear that she wants more people to understand that Venezuelans are happy that Trump is there. Because it’s still America. And let’s be clear. They see Trump for who he is. Maybe better than we do.

I will never forget sitting with her in late 2019, talking about Trump… this conversation is so clear to me that I can literally remember exactly where we were when we talked about it. She said that Trump reminded her, in that moment, of Venezuela before she left.

Just before Maduro came into office, but Chavez was still there. Power flowed through him. The power of the executive had expanded. The courts, the media, and the legislature were weakened. Loyalty mattered more than experience or independence.

Sound familiar?

Now, sure. But back then, I just remember thinking – sounds back but this is America. We’re going to get out of this as soon as possible. As we did, until we didn’t. Because we went back and reelected him! All of that to say, that may actually see him better than we even can and he is still preferred. Because this offers them a new path forward. Back to what voters voted for, when they cast their ballots for Edmundo Gonzalez, who ran in place of Maria Corina Machado, who was the leading opposition leader in the 2024 election but was barred from running, so Gonzalez ran in her place.

So now that that’s out of the way, here’s where things stand in what continues to be a rapidly developing story from an administration that, luckily, is totally organized and really has their lives together. Wait, no I’m sorry I’m being handed this note from the cat… sorry, Ruth says this is too long of a bit and I shouldn’t have started it at all.

(it’s actually just the same note from however long ago… I think this is, officially, my only prop.)

No, obviously this administration is fumbling their way through what could be one of the most important moments in Trump’s presidency. First, despite Trump saying that the US will run Venezuela for the time being, Secretary of State Marco Rubio says that’s not the case. The US will, however, continue the oil quarantine that’s been in place for the last week or so. Meaning that the US will be in charge of the oil.

What does this mean for Venezuela? It’s unknown, currently? If their Vice President were to run the country, this would not be a real change for Venezuelans. Though some in the media are painting her as a moderate, Delcy Rodriguez is anything but.

Remember, true feminism means recognizing that women can do anything. Including… be just as horrible.

She is the minister for both financial and oil – two things that have been used to create the humanitarian crisis in the country. She is a loyal defender of Maduro. She has helped put Venezuela in the place it is right now and if she is allowed to continue to run the country, all that will have really happened here is a reshuffling. Not a

And what of us? What of Trump? His own Chief of Staff described him as having an alcoholic’s personality. Now that he’s gotten a taste of taking over a country, will that be enough?

Of course not!

On Sunday he again said, “we do need Greenland, absolutely.” Stephen Miller’s wife (yeah, someone saw him, accessed his personality, and was like – I better lock that down!) even posted a picture of Greenland with an American flag on it.

On Saturday Marco Rubio said this about Cuba: “If I lived in Havana and I was in the government I’d be concerned, at least.” Trump was clearer: "I think Cuba is going to be something we'll end up talking about, because Cuba is a failing nation right now."

Trump also said this on Saturday: "Something's going to have to be done with Mexico.”

So… that’s… where things stand.

Gulp!

Trump Sends National Guard Troops Home

-via NBC News

While Trump acts out abroad, here in America he was forced to… chill? Take a Supreme Court mandated chill pill?

Up is down. Left is right. It’s mayhem!

Last Wednesday Trump announced that he would be removing National Guard troops from Chicago, Portland, and my precious city of angels, who has never done anything wrong, ever, Los Angeles, after the Supreme Court declined an emergency required to pretty please let him do authoritarianism over the holiday break. Saying the troops were necessary to enforce immigration policies.

The court ruled, however, “At this preliminary stage, the Government has failed to identify a source of authority that would allow the military to execute the laws in Illinois.”

As a reminder, the military cannot act as the police against its own citizens unless the President invokes the Insurrection Act. Ironically, he has not done it yet. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m very thankful. That’s the last thing anyone wants. It would be horrible.

I’m just saying – dude loves an insurrection. Remember when he did one? And Mitch McConnell let him get away with it? And then voters were like, I’m fine with the fact that he did sexual assault and insurrection because something about eggs? And now here we are…

Anyway, in response Trump said: “We will come back, perhaps in a much different and stronger form, when crime begins to soar again — Only a question of time!”

The saying is “only a matter of time” you DUNCE! You can’t do anything right!

Berlin Power Outage

-via AP News

In Berlin, approximately 45,000 homes were without power on Saturday, into Sunday, in what the country is calling a politically motivated attack.

Some may be left in the dark until Thursday.

It’s being investigated as an act of terrorism, with authorities comparing it to a similar outage in September, brought on by left-wing activists.

Swiss Bar Fire

-via NPR

In Switzerland, forty people were killed, and another 119 were injured after sparking candles on champagne bottles ignited a fire in a Swiss ski resort just after midnight on New Year’s Eve/New Year’s Day.

It is one of the deadliest events in the country’s history.

Absolutely horrific.

And that’s it. That’s the news.

For… now.

Obviously we have more to talk about. The Epstein stuff, for example. You’re hearing this on Monday. Congress will be back in session today. Presumably, lots will happen today. Lots to cover when that happens.

Until then… you know… we’re here.

If I can be serious for like, just a quick second. There are a lot of unknowns right now. I understand that sometimes it might feel easier to stop paying attention. Right now is the time to dig in. Pay more attention.

I’m not going anywhere (is that helping or hurting? Who knows!). We’re in this together. They would like it more if we weren’t paying attention. It would be easier for them.

Which is exactly why we’re not going to give a single inch.

Stick in this with me.

Speaking of… hey, the Substack is back. If you were already a subscriber, it’s in your inbox right now. If not, it’s free! It’s been updated a little, so now it’s like a daily newspaper. All the news that’s fit to… email. The opinions aren’t going anywhere (if only wishing made it so!), but basically it’ll be a daily little newspaper with fun bonus stuff.

Plus also if you’re watching this show only with your ears, as a reminder there’s the YouTube. I’m telling you – this show is worth $10 million a year.

And yet here I am for you, for free. I’m so nice.

Or am I… a chump?

Hey guess what? I’m proud of whipped cream. It’s also National Whipped Cream Day.

But more than whipped cream – because you are not airy, and there’s no such thing as too much of you… I’m proud of you.