09/02/25

Good morning! It’s Tuesday, September 2nd.

Telephone Tuesday.

This is not an excuse to call me.

It’s 2025. Telephones are for texting.

And now, the news.

CDC Changes

-via ABC News, Reuters, NPR, and NY Times

Starting with the CDC, and not just because I have the sniffles (the pollen count is out of control!) – Last week Susan Monarez, the US director of the CDC, was fired less than a month after being sworn in for… well, it says here refusing to support "unscientific directives" or dismiss health experts.

What. A. Monster.

Following her dismissal, four senior CDC officials resigned.

On Monday, nine former directors published an Op-Ed in New York Times accusing Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (cursed sentence) of “endangering every American’s health,” adding that what he’s done to not just the CDC but our public health care system at large is “unlike anything we had ever seen at the agency and unlike anything our country had ever experienced.”

Cool cool cool cool cool

Replacing Monarez is Jim O’Neil, who has previously held positions in HHS under George W. Bush but most recently he’s run investment funds for… Peter Thiel! The billionaire who backed JD Vance’s rags to very very awkward riches life.

O’Neil is a big Make America Measles I’m sorry Healthy Again supporter, so expect him to fall in line. He is not a scientist or a physician. He and I are basically the same amount of qualified for the job and I want you to know something… I’m not qualified for this job.

I’m recording this on a holiday weekend – expect that this may drag out into this week. I say this because at first Monarez was asked to resign and she said no thanks, but brave to ask! And so she was fired. My hunch is that we haven’t seen the last of her yet.

And good for her, our lives literally hinge of people being brave enough to stand up to this administration in big and small ways.

Afghanistan Quake

­-via BBC

And in Afghanistan, more than 800 people are dead, and almost 3,000 people have been injured, after a 6.0 earthquake hit just before midnight on Sunday.

The worst damage is in the mountainous region of Kunar, which has also experienced flooding and mudslides in the last few days, resulting in limited access to many areas.

This comes in addition to a region already dealing with aid cuts and what the World Food Program describes as an unprecedented food crisis —a term used to describe periods when multiple, overlapping crises threaten food availability, access, and affordability on a massive scale (for example – an unstable economy, on top of reduced humanitarian aid, plus decades of conflict in the region and hey – how about an earthquake as well now?).

The rescue efforts continue but, as I said, it’s tough when road access in some of the hardest hit areas are limited.

Rudy Guiliani

-via CNN

Former America’s Mayor turn how did we let him get that nickname Rudy Guiliani is recovering after being involved in a serious car accident over the weekend.

I said he was recovering! Calm down! It was a fine opening! His vehicle was rear-ended at high speed, and he was rushed to the hospital, where he was diagnosed with a fractured thoracic vertebrae, multiple lacerations and contusions, as well as injuries to his left arm and lower leg.”

If you didn’t grow up with my mom, or didn’t work on two seasons of Hart of Dixie and one of Grey’s Anatomy and so aren’t basically a doctor like I am – he has a broken bone in his spine, injuries to his left arms and lower leg, as well as a few cuts and bruises.

In no way am I writing off what happened, I’m just translating.

In fact, I’m not even saying anything bad here – he’d been flagged down by someone who’d been a victim of domestic abuse and called 911 and stayed until the police came.

Ugh. People are complicated! Be one thing! Bad people doing good things really confuses the narrative!

Anyway, he’s a human being, as are the other two people who were injured in the crash. Here’s hoping for a speedy recovery for all three, as well as for the woman that he pulled over to help.

And we wish nothing good, ever, for the person who did the abusing.

And then once Judy Ruiliani (as he’s known in my family because my stepdad accidentally called him that once and he will never let him forget it) is absolutely fully healed… I will return to my regularly scheduled programming because that dude still tried to overthrow the election and help an insurrection.

Human beings contain multitudes!

Immigration in America

-via The Guardian

And in Chicago, while DC continues to be under a hostile government takeover, Chicago is bracing itself for the same after Trump decided that’s the next place for its big ICE invasion, which may or may not include the National Guard as backup, which is expected to begin on Friday.

On Saturday, Chicago’s Mayor Johnson signed an executive order meant to give the city’s agencies and law enforcement some guidance “in the midst of escalating threats from the federal government.” Because, as we know, chaos is part of the strategy here. They are agents of chaos. So an order affirming that local officials won’t “collaborate with federal agents on joint law enforcement patrols, arrest operations, or other law enforcement duties including civil immigration enforcement,” just helps clarify where the line is.

Chicago has been a sanctuary city since 1985. They are well within their rights not to work with federal ICE agents here. This is no different than when I talked about it when it happened in LA. If Chicago didn’t want to be a sanctuary city, they could have rewritten the laws. They didn’t, so presumably they want to continue being a sanctuary city. Ergo, they’re within their rights here.

It’s Tuesday. Things in Chicago are expected to begin on Friday, and we’ll see. If that sounds ominous… I mean, yeah it’s not amazing. It’s a hostile government takeover.

ISO: The President

-via Newsweek

And finally, the president of the United States is missing.

Well… um… not officially.

He’s just not around.

So I’m gonna tell you this story, but first the rules – we’re not doing conspiracy theories. And… well, I guess those are all the rules.

Here are the facts – on August 26th, Trump attended three-hour a cabinet meeting. On the 27th, 28th, and 29th– nothing. From history’s most talkative president, he had no public meetings, no questions tossed to him while he was in front of a very loud engine (seriously, why is he always answering questions with a crazy loud background?), no pictures of him just walking around – nothing. His calendar had no public events.

It should be noted that on Thursday, 100% likely by a combination of coincidence and the fact that he a dunce – JD Vance told USA Today, in an update about Trump’s health: "a terrible tragedy” he’s ready to take the reins, adding, "I can't think of better on-the-job training than what I've gotten over the last 200 days."

By Saturday, a conspiracy theory had popped up online that perhaps… he… was… dead.

The Vance quote didn’t help anything, but what people forgot was the rest of it, which was: "But I feel very confident the president of the United States is in good shape, is going to serve out the remainder of his term and do great things for the American people,"

Anyway, so now we’re off to the races and it’s a fair question – where’s the president? So then, suddenly, the White House put out photos of him kind of going golfing. And again, we’re not doing conspiracy theories but I want to be clear about what photos we got.

First, he posted a photo of him golfing with someone that the internet was quick to point out was actually a week old.

That’s helping anything.

A few more pictures have emerged and, because we’re not doing conspiracy theories, until proven otherwise, I have no reason to believe these photos are fake. They’re not from the White House, they’re from the AP press pool. They’re fairly far away and grainy, but they are of Trump and he does appear to be headed out to golf.

Obviously, as previously stated, I’m a doctor, but this is not my specialty – I don’t know but he doesn’t look great in the photos. There’s also no video of him. Nor do we have any evidence of him actually golfing.

There are Truth Social posts. That’s… all I’m willing to say about the posts, which is that they do, in fact, exist.

As of this recording, we have not physically heard from the president nor have we seen anything beyond a couple very grainy photos.

I think it’s fair to ask what’s happening. He’s 79 years old with health issues, some we know about, some we can only guess at because there is a history of this administration lying through their teeth.

I’ll keep you updated. I think it’s something to keep an eye on.

Something I do think is funny is that one of the things posted on Truth Social is: “NEVER FELT BETTER IN MY LIFE. Also, DC IS A CRIME FREE ZONE! President DJT”

Which is so funny. That’d be like me saying “Never felt fewer allergies in my life. Also, Ted Lasso season 4 was always planned; season 3 was never a series finale. KiMSNBC.”

Dumb.

And that’s it. That’s the news.

I’m proud of… people who remember that if you don’t have anything nice to say… save it for the group chat because the internet is forever.

Also texting.

But more than that. Because no one in the world has better things to say (nice and also… not nice but it’s funny so it’s great) – I’m proud of you.